May 12, 2015

"A rogue group of subway vandals calling them the ‘Subway Conquestors’ is allegedly on a mission to attack the rail system."

In NYC, "the acts are getting more extreme as the vandals try to one up each other. They have been accused of changing destination signs to confuse passengers, surfing train cars, and stealing MTA equipment and gear. 'It’s extremely dangerous. The tools and keys they have give them full control over subway trains just like any other employee of the MTA — which is incredibly scary, because this is 16, 17-year-old kids.'"

10 comments:

James Pawlak said...

Introduce them to the "Third Rail.

Etienne said...

I smell Homeland Security justifying a bigger budget.

I could solve this problem, like the railroads did in the 19th Century.

Hire a few men, and tell them we don't want to know where they bury the bodies.

jr565 said...

Is "conquestor" even a real word? I've never heard it used to describe someone who engages in conquests.

jr565 said...

How about subway Subjugators. There you get not only a real word but also alliteration. Which always makes your group sound cooler or more professional.

jr565 said...

They probably watched fight club and now think they have to random acts of violence or subversion since they are revolutionaries just like tyler durden.
Either that or they're just really dumb.

Lem the artificially intelligent said...

It's de Blasio time... where did I hear that?

rhhardin said...

There was a New Yorker cartoon long ago, when there were Lionel trains everywhere, of a commuter glancing out the window to see a huge boy at a huge Lionel train transformer.

Michael K said...

My standard response to any NYC story.

“Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.”

H. L. Mencken

Unknown said...

"Railroad Police". problem solved

lee said...

Welcome back to the 1970's!!