July 8, 2006

Guys, you don't have to wear shorts.

Consider kilts:

Kilts 

Photographed right here in Madison, Wisconsin, where I also saw this three foot high ceramic sculpture of a finger.

Giant finger 

No, there's no relationship between the two photographs... except in your mind.

ADDED: What I'm leaving out is a lo-fi video I took of the Prince Myshkins singing about how the Founding Fathers were girlie men. If they email me and tell me to go ahead and upload the video to YouTube and post it, you can be sure I will. "Check out the pleated knee stockings on John Jay... Up jumps John Blair in a puff of powdered hair..." Seriously, email me, guys. That was amusing, but I don't want to violate your copyright.

39 comments:

Randy said...

4-year-old Little Mr. Apricot got fired for showing just such a finger.

AllenS said...

Two corrections: Those are not kilts, they are dresses. Second, that isn't a finger, it's a thumb.

Ann Althouse said...

Aliens: Those aren't dresses. They are clearly two-piece outfits. If there's some special meaning to the word "kilt" that I'm missing, then they are skirts. And look at your thumb. Can you get it into that position? No. That is an index finger. Though it does resemble the lower half of a fat woman's body.

Ann Althouse said...

Internet Ronin: I say it's an index finger. Whether an index finger in that position is an obscene gesture is a question I leave to be resolved by Justice Scalia.

Jennifer said...

I'm curious what the difference between kilts and shorts are, to your way of thinking, Ann.

Why are kilts more acceptable to you than shorts? Or do you mention it as an equally fug alternative?

I mean, I know how I percieve them differently. But, shorts are acceptable to me. Real shorts. Not manpris.

Jennifer said...

BTW, I can get my index finger into that position far more easily than my middle finger. So, I say its an index finger as well.

luagha said...

Those are Utilikilts, of course. Originally crafted in the Seattle area, and spreading all about the place. They're very well-made and comfortable.

Randy said...

And Little Mr. Apricot thought he was just letting everyone know that he was #1!

As you saw it up close and personal, I must defer to your better judgment. Besides, I can't do that very convincingly with my middle finger, but I can with the index finger.

I definitely agree that it is NOT a thumb, and no, I can't do that with my thumb, although both of my thumbs are double-jointed, an admittedly useless attribute, save for frightening drunks and small children.

Freeman Hunt said...

Ack! Don't encourage them to wear kilts.

Ann Althouse said...

"Manpris." LOL.

Ann Althouse said...

Hey, I don't see too well. I think that's "allens" not "aliens." Would that all my mistakes amused me that much!

buddy larsen said...

I can't 'see' the finger/thumb--but I DO see an elephant walking away, a straight rear-on shot (albeit with a highly swollen tail).

Laura Reynolds said...

Gee that reminds me I have to make a doctor's appt.

Tibore said...

Manpris:
"Gay slang. Men's pants cropped between ankle and mid-calf, after capri pants, or "capris""

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=manpris

Dear Lord, some guys actually wear those?

(*shudders*)

Palladian said...

Yes, Tibore, unfortunately they do. And here in New York, it's not just gay men that wear them. Worse yet, they are often paired with flip flops, which is an even worse crime than the shorts. As much as I can appreciate a man's feet (in the proper context) I DO NOT want to look at your hairy, dirty toes while riding the subway. Imagine the mentality of a person who would willingly wear flip flops to walk the hot, filthy streets of New York.

As for Ann's picture, I have several comments.

1. Because of the presence of Birkenstocks and what looks to be organic arugula peeking out of the backpack, I question whether these aren't actually really butch lesbians.

2. Even looking at the large version of the photograph, I cannot tell what the buttons on the backpack say, except that one of them says NO. NO pants? NO, I'm not wearing underwear? NO, this is not a frat initiation? Any ideas?

3. Is that a rosary bead eyeglasses chain being sported by the individual to dexter?

4. The worst aesthetic mistake, by far, exhibited in this photograph is those late-70s-early-80s sidewalk lamps. Lamp poles with illuminated polyps! Brilliant!

Danny said...

Palladian: Above 'NO' is 'VOTE' in smaller font. The button concerns the gay marriage/civil union ban Wisconsin will vote on this November.

Ann Althouse said...

Palladian: What I rush to assure you of is that we are in the middle of an expensive remodelling of the street and those lamps, which were once quite fashionable, are being replaced.

As for the fresh greens in the backpack. That's a great Madison detail. They are walking west on State Street, that is, away from the farmers market. Even macho guys need their veggies!

And no, they are not women. They were very hefty, football-type guys.

Palladian said...

Ann sez:What I rush to assure you of is that we are in the middle of an expensive remodelling of the street and those lamps, which were once quite fashionable, are being replaced.

Well, belted velour tunic tops were once quite fashionable...

And no, they are not women. They were very hefty, football-type guys.

Oh good, now I can admit to finding them hot. I do admit to being slightly disappointed that there aren't hefty, football-type, be-kilted, Birkenstock-wearing lesbians wandering around Madison with organic vegetables.

Danny sez: Above 'NO' is 'VOTE' in smaller font. The button concerns the gay marriage/civil union ban Wisconsin will vote on this November.

I knew Madison was pretty liberal, but I didn't imagine that even the football jocks would be pro-gay marriage. Maybe they're gay football jocks. In Birkenstocks.

Tibore said...

"I knew Madison was pretty liberal, but I didn't imagine that even the football jocks would be pro-gay marriage. Maybe they're gay football jocks."

That'd never happen in Ohio. ;)

------

Word verif: preaky. I kid you not; I have a screenshot to prove it. That's fretty preaky, man.

buddy larsen said...

preaky: proud and freaky ?

buddy larsen said...

Big, roomy country, room for all boats to float--worth preserving--

Beth said...

Palladian, I share your disappointment; linebacker dykes with organic veggies sound like fun. Here's a hint that can save you some embarrasment in a "drag queen or big-haired Texas gal?" situation: check out the calf muscles. You can see on these two that they're placed high, slightly above the middle of the lower leg, and especially on the one on the left, they're defined and prominent. Biological women's calves are a bit lower, and generally not so cut. It's not a hard and fast rule, but it's a good clue.

I love men in kilts. I think it's a savage, macho look, and for some reason, I like that.

As for "manpris," I've been hating them for awhile. Some guys, straight guys, I suspect, try to get away with calling them "pirate pants." Righto, Captain Jack. It's the Seinfeld Poofy Shirt episode all over again.

Jennifer said...

Elizabeth: LOL. Oh, ok, as long as they're pirate pants...you don't look like a prissy, jackass at all! :)

Anonymous said...
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buddy larsen said...

...or clashing with Edward Longshanks, King of England, on the bloody field of Falkirk?

AllenS said...

Ann: It's pronounced AllenS, not allens. I hope that's not too alien. It's a man's thumb on the leg of a elephant. Why can't you people see that?

Ann Althouse said...

AllenS: I agree that there's an elephant leg attached, but it's still not a thumb. There's a second joint at the top that simply isn't a thumb joint.

Anonymous said...

It's fun to misunderestimate artist intentions. The finger folded like a trunk, clearly not pointing the way, with a thick hide and 'only one leg to stand on' could be someone's idea of Bush. I would disagree, of course. The leader of our herd clearly has tusks.

The men are kind of cute and look like Braveheart on granola. Lots of granola.

Anonymous said...

"Under Rove's Thumb" is my last and baddest guess.

X said...

Kilts have come to be pretty much de rigeur among bear-type gays in the past few years. Definitely beats leather short-shorts in terms of dignified farmers-market shopping.

What I rush to assure you of is that we are in the middle of an expensive remodelling of the street and those lamps, which were once quite fashionable, are being replaced.

What a damn waste. Especially since they're just a couple of years from being charmingly retro.

Freeman Hunt said...

I love men in kilts. I think it's a savage, macho look, and for some reason, I like that.

It only seems savage and macho to me if the guy just stepped out of a time machine. It seems pretty cool if the guy is in a traditional kilt and playing bagpipes.

But a regular guy striding around in a modern kilt? "Dorky" is the word that most readily comes to my mind.

But then, I prefer that men look like they don't give much thought to their clothes. Nothing weird, yet nothing too refined for day-to-day wear. Just blah. For men's clothing I like blah. To me that is the most savage, macho look.

SippicanCottage said...

Catherine- Did you say: Under Rove's Thumb?

Under Rove's thumb
The polls that once had Bush down
Under Rove's thumb
Truth Out! that once pushed him around

He's svengali
Kevin Barrett? - fast food clothes he wears
Svengali, the change has come,
He's under Rove's thumb

Aint it the truth babe?

Under Rove's thumb
Helen Thomas has just had her day
Under Rove's thumb
Tony Snow has just changed her ways

He's svengali, yes he is
The way she does just what shes told
Svengali, the change has come
Shes under Rove's thumb
Ah, ah, say its alright

Take it easy babe
Take it easy babe

Jennifer said...

LOL, Freeman Hunt. Yes, kilts are savage and macho on Braveheart. Not so much on someone out shopping.

I will admit that these gentlemen manage to pull it off way better than Ashton Kutcher does. Perhaps, we should have a weight limit on the kilts? You must outweight the kilt to wear it?

Garble said...

Kilt = Skirt.
The world kilt is a from a Germanic word for skirt. It was coined when the British isles were invaded from the north. I've seen those guys btw. (I think) They're definitely distinctive.

Jennifer said...

Garble - do they wear kilts often? I was wondering that. I was wondering also if they had to coordinate with each other to make sure they didn't match.

Anonymous said...

Sippican Cottage,

LOL! With a song like yours, you'd look smashing in skintight chinos and a button-down oxford shirt open to your belt, tastefully strutting the stage at a GOP fundraiser event.

Sanjay said...

I have to point out this as well, at http://mariam.elnaggar.googlepages.com/home8a

Anonymous said...

3 feet high? It looks more like 20 feet high. The perspective is very strange.

chuck b. said...

Oh, my finger hurts just looking at that sculpture.